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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:03:53 GMT -5
Side 2 Act 4: Infinity MechanismlD: Yukari, how many of us are still kicking?bY: I really don't know. There's you, and me, and the rest of my group, I'm pretty sure the Crockers are still in action, Iji is still around, Eientei is protected, Ran hasn't gone insane yet, Sora we haven't heard from ever since he went after Roxas and Youmu… I think Halley and Renko got all the kids off-world… Xion and Saïx are somewhere else. Other than Seija, anyone on the Moon, and the Taoists… Pretty much about 97.8473% (repeating, of course) of all youkai, yousei, and non-invader humes in Gensokyo are either in the lair of the catfish, in the clutches of the enemy, or on the other side of the Sanzu. (The, uh, percent error on that statistic is exactly plus or minus pi.)lD: Here they come. Looks like they're armed to the teeth, too. [Luster Purge]!bY: [Mist Ball]! C’mon, get closer so I can hit ya!
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:10:46 GMT -5
{bgm} bG: We’re up against the wall, and I’m not the wall! They’ve got mechas and they know how to use ‘em!lD: TO ARMS! Let’s make ‘em pay for all they’ve done!bY: Uhh… fuckdammit, more nukes. Are they trying to wipe us all out? That’s it, I’ve had enough of them. I’m sick and tired of their useless attempts to capture us. LIMIT BREAK: Omnislash!gM: SHIT! Man down! Man down!hR: Uh-oh... that didn't go very well.eI: That shouldn't have happened. Cloud Strife does not end up impaled on his own blade after a limit break.aA: Couldn't she have just used her Comb Rave instead?fD: AAAAAH!!!
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:13:59 GMT -5
Side 3 Act 4: GAIA BLOSSOM (In Which We Go To A New Island, Build A Great Big Doge, And Otherwise Have Someone Else Deal With Randomly-Generated Shenanigans In Our Adventuring Career) (And we press X to wage war) Great, I got press-ganged into heading to the Aether Paradise. Now everyone knows me by my face alone, although for right now they're all playing stupid. So, first and foremost, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF ---
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:15:53 GMT -5
...
mmph wrstfargle… uuuuu…
can't… breathe… no air…
jus'... gonna...
*zzz*
*sound of fistfight*
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:19:17 GMT -5
Hau: Listen, you grunts. I've decided that Alice will be mine and I refuse to let you sick… Um. OW OW NO I’LL NEVER LET YOU GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS ON HER AAH HELP
Faba: WOULD YOU STUFFY LITTLE BRATS STOP PUMMELING HIM so I can tell him why he is wrong? Faba: You there. Unintelligent, foolish youth. Do you realize that you've fallen blindly in love with an abomination? This girl, Alice… Latian, is a freak! A mutant! And as far as we know, her reproductive system is incompatible with that of a human (although to confirm that, we’d need to clone a sufficient number of her egg cells and attempt to fertilize them, which we can do.) Not to mention that such a relationship is tantamount--- Hau: SHUT UP FABA. Faba: Hey, wait, I'm not going to v-v-viol… uh-oh, now I've done it. AHH I PROMISE THAT NOBODY WILL HAVE THEIR WAY WITH HER HAU PLEASE DON'T HURT ME I’M NOT DEPRAVED UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE HERE
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:21:27 GMT -5
Hau: And whadda ya mean she's a Pokémon? She isn't one, she's perfectly human! Hoopa: *ahem* Hau: I mean, just hug her, feel the contours of her face and glutes! She’s not a Lopunny or a Delphox or a Gardevoir or whatever! She ain't got the muzzle, fur, or the hips to be them! Faba: She's a Legendary- Hau: She is far too large to be a Mew or a Celebi or, or a Victini! She isn't made of metal, or rock, or ice, she lacks a tail, there's no wings, and her legs are too thick to be a Melotta! She’s only got two human arms that don't unwind, can't warp space, doesn't cause nightmares, doesn't breathe fire or water or electricity, she isn't manipulating the weather or purifying the air or making plants grow or - or anything! No life, no death, no time, no rain, no anything! Hoopa: *AHEM* Faba: And it's more than that: she's a monster who reads minds, too!
Hoopa: fukkit. HEY GUYS, THERE'S A PAIR OF DONPHAN MATING OUT ON THE DECK! That should get those grunts away from my charge, at least.
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 10:48:10 GMT -5
Faba: Oh. It's you. Hoopa, please, back me up here, educate this foolish child on her nature.Hoopa: Hmmm… No. Faba: PLEASE I BEG OF YOUHoopa: Hmmm… Beg harder. Faba: PLEASEHoopa: Hau… Your “love” is a Latias. Faba is entirely correct in everything he says. Except for the bit right before you flipped out, that would be more of her mother's thing. Hoopa: What, you thought the last name was a coincidence? Also, she's already betrothed to another satori. So lemme just say this: Hau can you stop being a dumb fuck? By listening to the bad guys! Now have fun swimming to shore, and I’ll just place some egg cells in the freezer at your workplace Faba. FWACKOOM
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 11:12:41 GMT -5
Turns out I was out cold and nearly dead for two days after that incident. Hoopa has filled me in on the information: Faba only wanted me for reproductive research, Hau wants to marry me, Nebby still isn't in the bag, and my glamours have worn off.
To make matters worse, my third eye is starting to eject itself from the mammary that I shoved it in, as it seems that the tissue has slowly reverted to normal breast tissue, instead of that womb and birth canal, for lack of a better word. I'm also being told that my body is changing to resemble that of my siblings: pointed ears, the odd little arm flaps that become our wings when we Mega Evolve, the shape of my eyes, my legs have developed a light ruff of down, and I can feel the back fins coming in.
Gods, I feel like I'm gonna puke...
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 11:12:59 GMT -5
Euuuugh. I still don't feel any better. I am considering quaffing the Full Restore sitting in my bag. Hoopa is out shopping for meds and clothes for me, and AH CRAP WHERE'D YOU COME FROM?
*hurk* *blargh* *barf*
uuugh… that damn Araquanid, sneaking up on me like that. I really don't feel any better after capturing it. He wants to be called Trawler and refers to himself as a CATT: I assume that stands for Creature Aquatic Terrain Transport or something like that, but I feel far too sick to think right now.
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 11:16:38 GMT -5
Uuubbbghj… Thaaa diddint woo… OOh, ze worl ‘z spENnin… Coolrrs abLEENdeen… Iye’ZAm suuu stondrooonk… woOOO, prithee lil doots inna skai…
*sploosh!*
AAA HALP EIYE CONT SWEEM!
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Mar 18, 2017 11:18:25 GMT -5
Toxa (Mareanie) - We should help her. Gundam (Gosilpod) - Nah, she'll make it. Sirena (Primarina) - Um. No. She reacted very badly to the Full Restore she drank. She is clearly drunk off her ass, completely stoned, confused, and also probably badly poisoned. Oh, and she is obviously unable to swim. Someone needs to rescue her, and I don't have the physical strength to do so. Hisouten (Sandyghast) - I can't reach her. Gundam - I'm too heavy to float. Trawler - I'll get her. Toxa - No, you idiot, you'll just drown her some more on accident! Gundam - And you'll just crit her to death, you crown-of-thorns!
Sala (Salandit) - I'll… I'll do it. Everyone - BUT YOU'RE A FIRE-TYPE!
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Apr 5, 2017 8:58:30 GMT -5
Side 1 Act 4 Act π: Hopeless Situation Warriors of the Presbyterian Mosque {bgm}Nefer: Okay… They're all set up. The mines have been laid down, our forces have their backs to the rocks and their randomly-distributed guns loaded (and locked) and in position. We have ~4.5 thousand units up against about 59 giant mechas. It's a little overkill, but… I'm not going to take the risk of being routed on our first major military operation. Okay, here they come! Booting up comms program “patapon_communication_system.exe”... Running executable “gw1_compass.exe”... Attempting to reach deities of: War, Conquest, Battle, Victory… no hits? Oh dear, I was hoping for some divine intervention. Setting mental music override: “Sinister Shadows”... and O.K. YOU! CAN! DO!
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Apr 5, 2017 9:02:19 GMT -5
SILENCE YOU FOOLS. Look what you've done: a girl sacrificed herself to save reality in the wrong battle! You've all fucked up for the last time, and now you are all going to pay for it.
‘s a matter of fact, when I'm through with y'all…
“They’ll havta glue ya back together… in HELL.”
Now suck ‘em dry, girls! Screwing them over requires as much genetic material as we can get, because they're basically all clones. Oh, and cut their hair, too: we don't just need the blood, we need other parts of their genes too.
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Apr 5, 2017 9:14:53 GMT -5
Side 2 Act 4 Act Something: Vim and Vigor???: SILENCE YOU FOOLS. ???: Look what you've done: a girl sacrificed herself to save reality in the wrong battle! You've all fucked up for the last time, and now you are all going to pay for it. ???: ‘s a matter of fact, when I'm through with y'all… “They’ll havta glue ya back together… in HELL.” ???: Now suck ‘em dry, girls! Screwing them over requires as much genetic material as we can get, because they're basically all clones. Oh, and cut their hair, too: we don't just need the blood, we need other parts of their genes too. gM: Oh gods Yukari! Are… are you okay?hK: That’s… not supposed to happen, is it? Just… getting stabbed with your own blade like that?
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Post by Nefer Nightbug on Apr 5, 2017 9:22:47 GMT -5
Side 3 Act 4 AND A HALF!(In Which We Stuff An Act Within An Act, Evolve Said Army, Quit The Black Comedy, Catch Up To Real Life, And All That Jazz) (And we still keep pressing X to wage war) {muted hospital beeping} Lillie: Alice… Please, wake up. Your Greninja just completed the Ghost trial and - Skull Admin Plumeria: THERE SHE IS! Get ‘em, guys! And take the Yungoos, too. We'll need a decoy target for that Hau idiot. Get ‘em an’ geddout… oh dear, we've just been caught.Grimsley: You grunts have guts. I overheard everything. Would certainly explain the masculine, croaking speech and the keen eyes of the girl I just sent to Po Town. Now, you insignificant little twerps have exactly twelve seconds before you end up on the receiving end of a beatdown, and now you are. Out. Of. Time. So prepare to lose. Badly. I, Grimsley, of the Elite Four of the Tao League of the Unova region, shall KNOCK YOU ALL DOWN!!! Grunt: DON'T MOVE OR THE LIFE SUPPORT GETS IT - WHEN DID I HAVE A HUGE HOLE IN MY CHEST?! Skull Admin Plumeria: Oh, wow. One of those Elite Four dingbats. If you ain’t using Poison, I ain’t dating’ ya. Abra, get us outta here and deliver them to Lusamine for the bounty - ow, you'd DARE shoot an unarmed gal? Oh my, a man aft- AKPTH!
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