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Post by dementedDamsel on Nov 28, 2012 21:41:36 GMT -5
So, I first just wanted to say hello to you people here.
HEY THERE! ;D
I hope that was the correct formal greeting for a first meeting here. My Mother has tried rigorously in the past to teach me to be more sociable with others, and to better understand normal human interactions. So, I hope said greeting was EFFICIENT.
Back to topic... or have I even stated my topic? Ugh, my bad. I tend to be a little sidetracked sometimes. My fault entirely for being so DEFICIENT when it comes to social mores. My Mother has a better understanding of humans, and she's an android.
Anyhow, to the heart of the matter, I have just entered the Game, and I suppose this could be called my First Session. The Land I have arrived on is called by it's native inhabitants, THE LAND OF SILHOUETTES AND WOODS AND FROGS, or LOSAWAF for abbreviation. The place is quite, uhh... unusually, and perhaps even downright scary. Everything on this world is covered in long shadows that seem to reach on forever. They even seem to have depth, like a pool. A pool that's filled with pure darkness, I might add. That along with the distressing forestry that literally block out the sun (I think it's a sun at least, it's blue for some reason)in the deeper area's, just add to the rather grim landscape. The impish creatures that prey in the shadows with their bows and arrows, don't help matters either.
Strangely, though the Frogs part hasn't come up as of yet. Perhaps, you people can enlighten as to why that is?
Oh, I almost forgot. Before Mother decide to blast off to parts unknown with her Transformable Rocket Heels, she taught me that a great way to make connections to my fellow humans was to ask them questions that they can relate to.
So, does anyone else have a story about a particular foreboding Land.[/b]
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cannonOverload
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Post by cannonOverload on Nov 29, 2012 1:20:29 GMT -5
WELP.
WELCOME TO THE FORA KID.
THE DEPTH OF SHADOWS IS PROBABLY THE SILHOUETTES PART OF YOUR LAND. THAT IS NORMAL.
AS FOR THE FROGS, YOU'RE BEST OFF ASKING genesisArtificer ABOUT THAT. HE'S THE EXPERT ON THE FROG BULLSHIT.
YOUR MOTHER IS AN ANDROID? NEAT.
I AM CO-7/64, MILITARY-GRADE COMBAT AI, AND FORMER COMMANDER OF THE ELITE LONG-RANGE COMBAT DIVISION.
IN CASE YOU, OR ANYONE ELSE IN YOUR SESSION, EVER BECOMES A PLAYER KILLER, I LEAVE THIS MESSAGE:
I AM DEAD SERIOUS. MURDER IS NOT TOLERATED HERE.
NOW... I'M SORRY, BUT THIS MUST BE SAID. YOU MUST REALIZE THIS NOW, AND NOT LATER. SO YOU CAN AT LEAST SAY YOUR GOODBYES. THE REALITY OF THIS FUCKING GAME... IS THIS:
.......... .......... .......... I'M SORRY.
*HAND ON CHEST, OPTICS OFF*
MAY [The Grid] INSPIRE US, MAY [The Nu l] OBSCURE US, MAY [The Haze] MULTIPLY US, MAY [The Pulse] DEFEND US, MAY [The Breeze] CLEAR OUR WAY, MAY [The Soul] COMFORT US, MAY [The Groove] DRIVE US, MAY [The Shade] CALM US, MAY [The Wave] GIVE US STRENGTH, MAY [The Break] SHATTER OUR OPPOSITION, MAY [The Blight] GIVE US ETERNAL REST, MAY [The Wrath] RULE US, MAY [The Growth] RESTORE US, MAY [The Voices] FREE US, MAY [The Shine] FAVOR US, MAY [The Word] WATCH OVER US, MAY [The Path] INFORM US, MAY [The Faith] GUIDE US, MAY [The Beat] CHANGE FOR US, MAY [The World] ENCIRCLE US, MAY [The Drift] DRAW US TOGETHER, AND MAY [The Strife] REJECT OUR FINAL END.
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Post by unfathomableArchitect on Nov 29, 2012 4:51:48 GMT -5
Good gog cO! Must you terrify every newbie with unrequested nihilism right out of the blue? I swear to gog I don't care if you're in a /20/ meter war robot I'm going to hunt you down and tenderly shoosh-pap you right in the AI core if you don't cut this out.
To answer your question dM there are probably a few glitches (Like the frog land glitch where space players have three titles in their land, one of which is frogs), but it sounds about right.
The first part of Sburb is fixing your land because it comes pre-broken.
I've never heard of some of the stuff going on in your land, and some of it is probably glitches, but there's glitches that run from minor to major in everything. Just roll with it for now.
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Post by dementedDamsel on Nov 29, 2012 14:04:12 GMT -5
Um... that's somewhat distressing. Mother had informed me that, there would be a high probability of approximately 97.413% that, humanity would be irrecoverable DAMAGED population wise from the destruction the meteors would cause. Augh, but I didn't think that the complete extinction of my species would occur. So, it's just me and my "friends", humanity in it's entirely is gone and will never be restored. I guess this should be kind of emotionally devastating for me as a human, right? To be perfectly honest with myself and you others, I just can't seem to feel much impact with the loss of my world.
Does this make me callous and cold-hearted to you forum goers. I surely hope not, it's just that I have a rather small perception of the world and those in it, you know. For so long it was just me and Mother, alone in an underground Arctic science facility in middle of nowhere, with very little contact with the outside world.
If you do think I'm cruel or even sociopathic with regards to my apathy to the destruction of the world, then let me state that I'm sorry, this is just the way that I am.
YOUR MOTHER IS AN ANDROID? NEAT. I AM CO-7/64, MILITARY-GRADE COMBAT AI, AND FORMER COMMANDER OF THE ELITE LONG-RANGE COMBAT DIVISION.
Oh, wow, I must say I'm surprised that a synthetic is on this these forums! Yes, my Mother is indeed an android, she's also the central Administrative AI that operates the science facility that we live in. Apparently, the facility was once crewed by a large team of scientists and researchers, who studied the strange ruins and temples nearby. From what Mother told me it was very fascinating stuff they were uncovering. Unfortunately, the whole team died from a completely accidental neurotoxin leak before I "arrived" in my Mother's care. Her actually main body is a massive central computer within the heart of facility. But when she wants to be more personal she uses a bunch of android bodies that she can upload herself in.
I know it sounds pretty fantastical, but I suppose my life is just weird.
Oh. Um, if you can recall I mentioned my "friends" earlier in this post. I'm having some difficulties with being sociable with them. To be honest, I barely know any of them really that well. This most likely stems from the fact that I only contacted the group two weeks before the meteors landed.
Yeah, that along with the fact that they completely don't believe the circumstances of my unusually domestic life, are terrified of my Land and blame me for the deaths of their families and friends, because I was the one who introduced them to the Game(My Mother was the one who programmed it, but she wanted me to find others to actually Test it) has not exactly allowed me to be very sociable with my them.
Do you guys have any solutions to this problem, Mother has disappeared for some reason, and I really think I need the assistance of the others to survive this Game. [/b]
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Post by wanderingDreamer on Nov 29, 2012 15:07:39 GMT -5
...Uhh... Neurotoxin leak? Test? Erm... Would your Mother's name be Gladys? Caroline? An acronym spelled similar to that first name? Heheheh... She sounds like a nice lady. A darned shame I will never meet her.
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Post by incidentalCompeer on Nov 29, 2012 19:03:32 GMT -5
As a former 'less than thrilled' player, I can say that they'll never really get over it, at least not for a while, but there's no sense in blaming you for it. Blame the game really.
If you want to get in better touch with your teammates, and trust me you'll need to for survival, talk to them. Learn about them, build trust between people. Trust me when some big ugly "Imp" is looking to make you its breakfast, it's nice to know your coplayers are there to watch your back. "Inheritor Classes" involve responsibility and learning to build trust enough to be responsible.
Speaking of coplayers: do you have any details about them?
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Post by dementedDamsel on Nov 29, 2012 23:47:02 GMT -5
...Uhh... Neurotoxin leak? Test? Erm... Would your Mother's name be Gladys? Caroline? An acronym spelled similar to that first name? Heheheh... She sounds like a nice lady. A darned shame I will never meet her.
Um... I have no clue what your insinuating here. Mother's name has always been Mother, at least to me. But yes, Mother does enjoy testing things, mostly just the uncovered technologies in the temples near our home.
Speaking of coplayers: do you have any details about them?
Like I stated in the last post, I don't really know my "co-players" that well, and all my apparently DEFICIENT attempts to communicate with them have ended with rather violent accusations of me being responsible for single-handily destroying all mankind. Most of them have outright blocked me.
Ugh, making friends for the first time is quite a challenge.
I have at least managed to learn a little information about one of them though. He's a Knight of Mist, whatever that is, and his chumhandle is somewhatLacking. He just tends to wander around my Land, seemingly looking for something? I've tried to initiate a social interaction with him, but all he does is give me a dirty look and abscond.
Do any of you have a well-constructed hypothesis as to what he's doing on my Land. Ah... should I be afraid of him?[/b]
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Post by wanderingDreamer on Nov 30, 2012 0:33:10 GMT -5
Well, it's just that your Mother sounded eerily similar to a character from a game I used to play a lot, the game was Portal, it took place inside the Aperture Science Testing Chambers, the main character was a woman by the name of Chell. The main antagonist being a large robot in the center of the complex. Yeah... The following being Spoiler tagged in the event no one wants the end of the first game spoiled.
You proceed through test chamber after test chamber, armed with a gun that creates intradimensional gateways, or portals. Each test chamber more difficult, and lethal, than the last. You get to the last test chamber, complete it, and are on a moving platform, awaiting your promised cake and grief counseling, when the platform rounds a corner, and reveals it's leading to a fire pit. You wind up escaping thanks to a conveniently-located observation ledge, you walk through the innermost parts of the facility. When you arrive in the end, you find the one who nearly killed you. A giant robot dangling from the ceiling. The Genetic Lifeform and Disc Operating System, or GLaDOS for short. After a moment of forced idiocy(You are railroaded into destroying her Morality Sphere), you wind up having to defeat her using redirected rocket turret fire to knock off the rest of her essential spheres and throw them into a furnace specially designed to destroy these objects. I believe it was set at over 5000 K. Did I mention you are slowly being killed by neurotoxin during this whole ordeal? You win in the end, but She Gets Better in time for the sequel. Before it all began, the antagonist got access to a neurotoxin generator, and flooded the vents with it during Bring Your Daughter To Work Day. Killed all of the scientists. The children didn't die, though, and later became test subjects(Which I think is where Chell came from).
I don't mean to imply that your mother is some homicidal robot obsessed with testing or something. But I'm a fan of the Infinite Alternate Universes theory, alternate universes have JUST been proven to me as of a couple days ago(Aliens also exist!). The idea that that particular universe could exist somewhere, in accordance with the theory, is entirely valid. Whether or not it's valid in accordance with Sburb, I don't know.
I'll be frank. I would rather off myself with a rusty spoon than meet GLaDOS. Since your Mother sounds so similar to her, and my nerves are a bit frayed from... Well... Sburb in general... I was getting kind of worried.
I don't have anything against robots or aliens or anything! I mean, cannonOverload is a thirty-one foot(Or ten meter) tall robot who's primary weapon is a railgun-thing that fires at speeds easily measured in percentages of the speed of light. He's cool. Your Mother is pretty neat, too. I guess. So long as I don't meet her in any building she owns, or she asks me to test something, I should be cool.
========
My hypothesis as for why everyone seems to detest you? Your Mother made the Game. The Game killed the world. People have this tendency to vilify anyone so much as vaguely related to a bad project, even if they weren't involved with the project, or even KNEW[/b] about said project. Alternatively, you were the first person in? You started the Game. The Game killed the world. They're blaming you for pushing the hypothetical red button, in that case. In your defense, it was neither red, nor a button, so Murphy's Law doesn't apply to it. Why is the Knight on your Land? Immediate guess? Either Time Shenanigans(If possible, find out if you have a Time player), or he's your Client player, and he somehow reached his second Gate. Came up with another theory since I started typing. Knights normally help out the Space player with the Ecto-frog breeding duties, and he's there so his ARC doesn't tank. The thing he's looking for? Frogs. I'd assume finding a 3D shadow in a bunch of other 3D shadows is a bit of a pain. Real quick, do you happen to have a flashlight handy? If so, try using it on some of the shadows. Do the objects disappear entirely? Or can you actually see them?[/color]
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Post by tenaciousTheseus on Nov 30, 2012 9:07:29 GMT -5
The native Spaceman gets a native universe that's similar to Portal. Oh, the irony.
Anyways, you don't have any frogs yet because they're later on. You need to awaken your Denizen and light the Forge, first.
Knights don't help out with frog breeding. Or well. They're not forced to. They just do, or don't.
Frankly, it's impossible to say why your Knight of Mist is on your land without knowing any more. Try asking him. Although Mist is given to the antisocial, similar to Space in that regard, so he might be just as inexperienced as you are in social situations, and probably less willing to enter one.
Your land does sound unnerving and hard to navigate in, but it's normal and expected. No real glitches or anything. Alchemize up some light sources.
CO: Okay. Dude. A new person and your first instinct is to threaten him with overkill if he becomes a PK and tell him as bluntly as possible that his planet's gone? I'm a tactless asshole and I see the problem with that.
Anyways. Welcome to the fora. If you have any questions, feel free to ask, and we'll do our best to answer.
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Post by dementedDamsel on Nov 30, 2012 12:17:37 GMT -5
Well, it's just that your Mother sounded eerily similar to a character from a game I used to play a lot, the game was Portal, it took place inside the Aperture Science Testing Chambers, the main character was a woman by the name of Chell. The main antagonist being a large robot in the center of the complex. Um,uh,ugh, this makes no sense at all. Or does it make all the sense? My Mother, does indeed have a centralized body in the middle of the facility, and it is rather large. Also, our home does have several rooms dedicated to testing discovered alien technologies, some of which are somewhat dangerous. But she has NEVER, or would Never use human test subjects. She just uses the Automated Testing Drones, RED and LIME. She thinks their "MORONS", but their antics are very hilarious in my opinion. I wish I could send you guys a couple of their recorded testing sessions, with Mother's snarky commentary their even more funny. I don't know about this Chell character, but Mother has made reference to a "murderous, brain-damaged LUNATIC" that tried to destroy the facility, one or two times. Usually she just rants about this "LUNATIC", but sometimes she.... gets real sentimentally and kind of sad about letting the "LUNATIC", go. I think she really liked her. Maybe, they were best friends, or something? Regardless, I really can't see how my Mother in anyway can be villain in this Portal universe your talking about, she just wants to promote SCIENCE!
Anyways, you don't have any frogs yet because they're later on. You need to awaken your Denizen and light the Forge, first.
Knights don't help out with frog breeding. Or well. They're not forced to. They just do, or don't.
Alright, UA also made mention to something revolving around the breeding of frogs. Does this in anyway be in connection to the temples near my home with all the strange frog statues? What's the end goal of this frog breeding? And what's a Denizen and how would I be able to lit this Forge, your mentioning?
Oh, and the Knight is supposed to assist me with my mission. Thanks, TT, with this information perhaps I can get him to actually talk to me. CO: Okay. Dude. A new person and your first instinct is to threaten him with overkill if he becomes a PK and tell him as bluntly as possible that his planet's gone? I'm a tactless asshole and I see the problem with that. Yeah, I don't want to judge, but whenever an AI starts to threaten humans with gross amounts of morbid violence, or start screaming out strange pseudo-philosophical statements, there's a chance that they might be going through RAMPANCY. It's happened to my Mother more then once, usually when RED and LIME really mess up a Test. She gets a strange look in her optic and starts to ask if maybe I should give it a try. It can be really scary sometimes.
So, yeah CO, maybe you should watch out for that before you go overboard and do something you might regret. [/b]
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cannonOverload
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Post by cannonOverload on Nov 30, 2012 19:42:30 GMT -5
I am really sorry for scaring you.
I've just been very, stressed recently.
Why?
Because I am only my main core right now, and going from 10 meters tall to half a meter, going completely blind and deaf, and unable to move, is extremely jarring.
anyway, I forgot to put down my native land: LOAAV. Land Of Asteroids And Vacuum. no atmosphere, very low gravity, and was more of a spherical cluster of asteroids than a planet.
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Post by wanderingDreamer on Nov 30, 2012 19:43:16 GMT -5
...Hoooo boy.
Yes, Chell busted up Aperture Science. (Edit: Spoiler tagged. Sorry, gA! Forgot!)
Twice if you include the time she installed the Intelligence Dampening Sphere(Named Wheatley in the credits and subtitles) in the control hub, giving him complete control of the facility. In her defense, the first time, she was almost murdered. Turnabout is fairplay, as the saying goes(I think). And the second time, GLaDOS was telling her that she would test her until she died, would reanimate her corpse, and have her test for all eternity. In GLaDOS's defense, reliving the ten minutes leading to your death repeatedly for several years(No time is listed, fans think it's anywhere from ten, to three hundred years) would probably make her more than a bit bitter. It all turned out alright in the end, though. Wheatley got spaced, GLaDOS was back in charge, Chell was free(After GLaDOS probably nearly giving her a heart attack by introducing her to the Turret Opera), and all was right in the world.
If you ever see your Mother again, ask her about ATLAS and P-Body. And while you're at it, ask about Caroline.
...Hehehe... Yes, those two are morons, aren't they? She did, after all, make them from calculators. *sighs* Oh, the memories. GLaDOS kept trying to irritate the hell out of Chell by taunting her with orphan jokes and fat jokes. My favorite of the latter was "Oh, look at you sailing through the air. Majestically. Like an eagle. Piloting a blimp."
...Out of idle curiosity, would your name be 'Cave Johnson', by any chance?
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Post by incidentalCompeer on Dec 1, 2012 0:01:00 GMT -5
Alright, UA also made mention to something revolving around the breeding of frogs. Does this in anyway be in connection to the temples near my home with all the strange frog statues? What's the end goal of this frog breeding? And what's a Denizen and how would I be able to lit this Forge, your mentioning? Oh, and the Knight is supposed to assist me with my mission. Thanks, TT, with this information perhaps I can get him to actually talk to me. [/color][/b][/quote] Alright here's the run down in brief: "Frogs" in the game are very important, you're going to breed these "Frogs" through an esoteric process of genetic re-amalgamation to create something called the "Genesis Frog". The "Genesis Frog" is really important to triggering the major late game events. The "Frogs" should start becoming more common the closer you get to actually starting the whole breeding process. I'm no expert on it, just that one unfortunate session a few rounds ago, and my "Native Land" was a "Frog Land" despite my "Native Aspect" being "Life".
The first thing you're going to do is talk to the little friendly creatures running around, those are your "Consorts". They're going to give you a bunch of clues to go get this "Forge" thing lit, never had to do that myself so you might want to ask someone who's played "Space" before for more on that process.
The "Denizen" is another thing your "Consorts" are gonna point you to. Your "Denizen" is going to be this big creature at the bottom of a cave, and you're going to want to talk to them. They'll give you stuff to do, and you're gonna go do it.
Out of curiosity when you started playing and opened the "Cruxtruder" you didn't happen to see a ball of concentrated seizure-inducing epicycloids did you?
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Post by genesisArtificer on Dec 1, 2012 22:25:57 GMT -5
Native Space Case, everyone get out of my way (except NoTT, he stays)
Kid. every single one of us had to struggle to connect. this is actually your Quest here. Usually this is not as bad, with the internet friends you had since you were just a kid, but you have it worse.
your Classpect is quite good. Ward of Space is basically Worlds darling, once you get your ass in the gear and get some ARC, you would never lose your way in the Land.
To wake the Denizen, you need to first make some Maturity Quests, and those are quite ok, because they would teach you how to connect to people. talk to people. don't fuck them over. if they would tell you that it is your fault, or your Mothers, just tell them that it is not the case. It is all games fault, not the programmers. if they want to kill you, kindly remind them that a Space Player is a key Player because without them you cannot have a "good" ending.
Learn standard [Babys First Portal] and will last you for like few days. Fun starts when you learn to [Frogjump].
WD: thanks for spoiling the game to everyone who didn't played it. It so happens that I did, but many of them didn't. also, you are insulting kids Mom in the front of them.
CO: the most hilarous thing is that you got all the blessings wrong ;D
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cannonOverload
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Post by cannonOverload on Dec 2, 2012 0:19:16 GMT -5
CO: the most hilarous thing is that you got all the blessings wrong ;D fuck-dammit which ones? message me with the corrections, please.
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